Happy Christmas (The Culture War is Over!)
It’s time to sing “Merry Christmas” and then leave it right there. At least for the rest of this year, let’s agree not to disagree. Not this close to that one special day.
If 2021 was the Chinese Year of the Ox, here in the UK it was the Year of the Intemperate Mule when we all argued over anything and everything and then stubbornly did it all again. Though it was always theorised that we might agree on Covid or passports or the art of taking the knee, of course, we never did. Then there were trans rights and bathrooms and who should be the next James Bond…
Whether you were for Idris Elba, Henry Cavill, JK Rowling, Greta, Piers (Corbyn or Morgan), Lawrence Fox…
“The name’s Mogg. Jacob Rees Mogg?”
Whatever your poison, it’s time to pass the bottle and let’s drink to your health!
‘Tis not the season to be “doing your research” so I really won’t labour the point. I hope you have a very Merry Christmas, you and your loved ones. We can then agree not to mention masks or vaccines or the small matter of “following the science”. You already know where I stand (or currently lie) on “Working From Home” and if you stand or lie differently… Well, it’s Christmas, so have a good one!
We don’t even need to argue anymore about Lewis Hamilton or Max Verstappen’s last lap or the state of English cricket, right and wrong (but mostly wrong). Our footballers came close, and anything else remains an argument for next year’s World Cup. Just enjoy a joyful holiday and wait to hear what’s the Christmas Number One. And then, if you still want to argue, I’m sure there’ll be time after the turkey but before the Queen at three. Just be sure to restrict our disagreements to the music and not Elton’s position on abortion or the Elgin Marbles or whether Quidditch is a politically correct sport. Leave those problems to stew where they are. There’s a whole year not yet opened and due to be delivered in just seven days.
And if we do settle back to watch some TV, let’s not argue if GB News is news or, if you’re so inclined, wonder the same about the BBC. Just let Santa weave his magic without questioning why, or how much tax he pays, where he pays it, and how he could save the world if he ever put his magical reindeers to better use. Even if you have a good point to say, perhaps don’t say it. It’s just not the festive way.
And if somebody does stupidly mention the ‘B-word’ over the next two weeks, let’s just bite our lips. We’ve had 350 days to reach an agreement and never once did. It’s unlikely to start now so let’s sing a carol instead or pull a cracker or strain a wrist on a Brazil. Do anything but talk about trade deals. Not till 2022.
And then, no doubt, we’ll debate Liz Truss in January and probably February and even into March, if she lasts. And as for Boris (the other B-word) let’s hope that he takes a back seat for two weeks, though he’ll probably return after Boxing Day. He’ll be either too early or too late (depending on your point of view) to lock us all down again, but now isn’t the time to argue that point. I know the temptation is to say more, but I won’t if you won’t. It’s Christmas, for goodness’ sake!
And if all of this means putting Christmas back into Christmas, then you’ll get no argument from me about whether it was ever missing in the first place. We have the whole of next year to argue about the words that annoy. So, let’s have no cultural Marxism this Christmas. No Antifa under the tree. No snowballs or gammon or cancelling either you or me. Let’s put the silence back into “Silent Night” and enjoy a very merry holiday.
Happy Christmas! The Culture War is over!
At least till 2022.